Escaping The Lies
by nashvillefan12
Summary: This takes place after Lamar's funeral with Rayna and Deacon.
1. Chapter 1

**I decided to join in the fun of writing what's to come (or rather what I'd like to see happen) with Rayna and Deacon when the show returns. (How many more weeks is that again?) :( I'm not really sure in which direction I'm going to take this but I'm open to suggestions! Hope you enjoy!**

"Are you sure about this Ray?" Deacon asked uncertain looking over at her in the passenger seat. She stared out the window. Without moving her eyes from the window, she simply nodded. A tear escaped her eye. He reached over and gently stroked her arm. It broke his heart seeing her like this.

At his sincere gesture, she turned to face him. "I just need to get out of Nashville." She replied. He took a deep breath and offered her a half smile, understanding her pain.

"What about the girls?" He asked still unsure of this plan she had in mind. "They're with Teddy." She replied, wiping the tears that continued to escape her eyes. "Don't you think they're going to be worried about you after everything that happened?" He asked trying to reason with her. "I just can't face them right now. I can't-" She started to say before breaking down.

A few minutes later, she pulled herself together and looked back over at Deacon. "Are you going to drive or not?" She asked. He struggled to give her a straight answer. She grabbed the door handle. "Fine." She pushed the door open a crack. "I will get out and walk if I have to." She threatened.

He grabbed her arm and pulled her back. "Ray, stop. I'll take you there." He said softly.

She took her hand off the door handle and settled back in her seat, shutting the door. She watched him fascine his seatbelt and turn the key in the ignition. She quickly fascines her seatbelt and off they drove.

Earlier that afternoon:

Rayna looked around at the familiar faces surrounded her at the grave site. Tandy stepped up and placed her rose on the casket. Rayna walked as her hand stroked the oak wood surface. Tandy took a step back, standing next to Rayna, reaching for her sister's hand. Rayna pulled her hand away, not wanting anything to do with her.

Daphne stepped up and placed her rose on the casket then looked up to the sky wondering if what they told her was true, that her Pawpaw was really looking down on her.

Rayna was the last to place her rose on the casket. She stood in front of the casket for a long time sobbing. They all decided to give her a minute after the graveside service was over.

Teddy had come up behind her and slung his arm around her shoulder. He kissed the top of her head. "Rayna let me take care of you please. I can move back in the house." He offered resting his chin on her head. She shifted her weight to put some distance between them. The last thing she wanted was to give their daughters the wrong idea. "Just take care of our children okay?" She asked. He nodded. "Of course but what about you? You were there for me when Peggy died. Let me be there for you." He turned to face her, reaching his hands up to her face and wiping the tears away.

Deacon had stood a distance away, talking to Juliette and Maddie. He looked over at the moment Teddy and Rayna were sharing. "Is she going to be alright?" Maddie asked catching where Deacon's eyes were staring.

Deacon looked to Juliette for answers. "Yeah, she will. You have a strong mama but she's going to need your help through this. It's tough losing a parent." Juliette advised. Maddie nodded watching Tandy and Daphne walk over to them. Tandy tried her best to hold back her tears as she fidgeted with Daphne's hair. She bent down and hugged both the girls. "Oh my babies!" She squeezed them tight. "I'm going to head out but if you need anything you call me okay?" Both the girls nodded. Tandy hugged them one more time. "I love you guys!" Tandy said. "Love you too." Both girls said in unison. Tandy walked away.

Rayna grabbed Teddy's wrists pulling them away from her face. "I'll be fine." She said. "Please just take the girls home. They've been through enough today." She pleaded. Teddy nodded and walked over to the girls, Deacon and Juliette. Juliette got the sense that Teddy needed a moment alone with Deacon. "Come on girls, let's go over here for a minute." Juliette said excusing them all.

Teddy and Deacon both shoved their hands in their pocket not saying a word. They both watched Rayna bend over the grave. "She had a fight with him just before he died, did she tell you that?" Teddy asked looking over at Deacon. Deacon shook his head. "No." He replied, his voice barely above a whisper.

Teddy kicked the ground in anger. "That son of a bitch took my wife." He said through his gritted teeth. "Hey hey." Deacon said touching Teddy's shoulder to calm him down. Teddy adjusted his tie and looked around. "Rayna asked me to take the girls home." Teddy said after calming down. Deacon nodded. "Okay, is there anything I can do?" Deacon offered. Teddy nodded towards Rayna. "Watch her. Make sure she gets home." Teddy said as he walked away.

Everyone had left but Deacon. He still stood back a ways observing her. She hadn't really moved. He decided to approach slowly. She had her head hung low as she sobbed. He bent down on the ground beside her and cradled her in his arms. "Why?" She yelled through her sobs. He pulled her tighter into his arms.

A few minutes later, she was sitting beside him without touching. She stared at the ground, her tears were frozen to her face and her eyes still watered. "He admitted to taking my mother's life. He was a murderer." She said without glancing up. "Ray-" Deacon startled to say.

"He said he loved her but he drove her off the road, he watched her die and then just walked away. He lied about it, my whole life, he lied." She said hurt. Deacon just listened, not knowing what to say. "And I'm just like him." She said bursting into tears again.

"What?" Deacon asked. "He stole my mother away from me just like I stole Maddie away from you." Rayna sobbed. Deacon grabbed her arm and shook her lightly. "Listen to me, you did not steal anything from me. You did what was best for Maddie. I understand that." Deacon said softly. "How can you forgive me? I lied." Rayna said.

"Let me ask you something." He said. Rayna looked up from the ground at his tone. "Was Maddie a happy child growing up?" He asked. Rayna nodded. "Did she have a good home?" He asked. Rayna nodded again. "That's all that matters. To know my child was taken care of and happy, that's what parenthood is about right?" He asked.

She nodded again. "And she had the best Uncle Deacon. What else could a child ask for?" He said lightening the tension. Rayna smiled. "Thank you." She said.

"You ready to get out of here?" He asked. "I guess so." She replied bringing her attention back to the headstone. He watched her trace the letters in the stone of her mother's name. "Do you want me to give you a minute alone?" He asked. She looked up and nodded. "Yeah I'll be right there." She replied. He nodded and walked back to his truck.

Soon Rayna joined him. "We better get you home." Deacon said. "I'm not going home." She replied looking out the window. "What do you mean you're not going home?" Deacon asked. "It's so toxic there. Teddy lies. Tandy lies. I can't be around that anymore." Rayna says. "Rayna where are you going to go?" He asked concerned. She hestitated a moment. "I-I've been thinking-" She started to say. "Where are you going to go?" He repeated. "The cabin." She said simply. "The cabin?" He repeated. "All you have to do is drop me off. I'll hide out up there for a while." She said trying to reason with him. "Please Deacon." She pleaded as tears returned to her eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for all the kind reviews! Still not 100% sure where to take this so I'm open to suggestions. Hope you enjoy! **

Deacon kept a watchful eye on Rayna taking his eyes off the road for a split second every now and then. She was quiet the whole ride up to the cabin just staring out the window and crying.

At one point, she must've cried herself to sleep. She looked exhausted leaning her head up against the window. Never once did she wake up when he stopped at the store to buy some groceries for the cabin.

The sun was about to set when they reached the cabin. He looked over at her still sleeping so peacefully.

He sighed before gently shaking her awake. "Ray, Ray, we're here."

As she slowly opened her eyes and lifted her head from the cold window, she looked out the window as if she were disoriented. She squinted her eyes until she could begin to focus.

"How long was I out?" She asked reaching her hand up behind her neck and massaging the crooks in it from sleeping so long in an awkward position. He smiled. "Long enough for me to stop at the store for your favorite snacks." He said holding up two bags. She nodded. "Thanks." She stretched her arms then sat up straighter in her seat. She reached for her phone that had been sitting in the cup holder beside her as she glanced down at the screen.

Deacon laughed as he watched her. "There's no service up here. Did you want me to take you back down into town so you can make a call?" He offered. She sighed placing the phone back in the cup holder. A look of sadness flashed on her face. "No, no, I don't want anyone knowing where I am."

He could see her eyes starting to tear up. He reached over and stroked her arm. "Rayna." He said gently. She buried her face in her hands. "I'm fine." She began to sob.

Deacon wasn't sure if he had made the right decision bringing her up to the cabin but she had practically begged him to. "Are you sure this is a good idea?" He asked second guessing himself as he leaned closer to her to wrap his arm around her shoulders. "It's not too late to head back home." He offered.

She shook her head. "No, I'm staying." She wiped away her tears, trying to convince him she made the right choice coming all the way up there.

He took a deep breath. "Okay." He said turning his attention back to the windshield. She looked over at him for a moment then grabbed his hand. "Thank you." She said managing a weak smile as a tear rolled slowly down her cheek. Looking over at her, he returned the smile and just simply nodded.

"Let's get in and get settled. Shall we?" He asked unbuckling his seatbelt. She looked over at him alarmed. "Wh-What are you doing?" She asked flustered. He shrugged. "I'm fixin' to head inside. Aren't you coming?" He asked casually.

"Deacon, I appreciate you bringing me up here but I really just want to be alone. I can let myself in." She explained. He crossed his arms and smirked. "So you're going to sit in the dark and freeze?" She gave him a blank look. "Ray, you're going to have to turn the electric on, bring in the firewood, flip the breaker when it blows." He rambled on and on. She looked at him confused. "Why would the breaker blow?" He smiled. "Well you know how you like to blow dry your hair while brewing coffee and using the toaster?"

She nodded. "Yeah."

"Well you can't do all that at the same time or you'll blow a breaker." He smirked. "As usual." He added.

She rolled her eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about." He laughed. "Yes you do. You always cursed at me like it was my fault."

She smiled at the memory. "Well you won't have to worry about that because you won't be here." She unbuckled her seatbelt. "Come on, show me where all this stuff is and then you better head back home." She warned.

"You don't always have to be so strong you know?" He said in a more serious tone, making her look at him.

"Yes I do." She replied. "Why because you're Rayna Jaymes?" He asked.

"I don't want to be Rayna Jaymes anymore. I don't want to live that lifestyle anymore. It's a lie. Everything about me is a lie." She said growing angry.

He pointed his finger. "THAT-" He said. "-is not true. Music is one of the most truthful things a person can have."

Tears started to form in her eyes again. "My mama used to say that." She cried.

"Well she was right." He said cocking his head to meet her gaze. "What do you say I help you unpack these groceries?" He offered.

She sighed. "You'll find any excuse to stay won't you?" She wiped away her tears one last time.

"Yep." He said with a smile. She laughed. "Fine but in the morning you're gone you hear me?" She asked. He grinned wide as he opened his door. "We'll see." He climbed out of the truck carrying the groceries.

She sat in the truck for a moment smiling and shaking her head. Then she opened her door and climbed out. She ran to catch up to him.


	3. Chapter 3

Rayna rubbed her hands together for warmth as she stood in front of the fire Deacon had just started. She was still very quiet, taking in everything around her.

Looking at the pictures sitting on the mantel and the record player that still sat in the corner where it always had, nothing had changed since the last time Rayna had been there.

She knew coming up to the cabin would freeze time and that was exactly what it did. It always felt like a different world up there, nobody telling her what to do or when to do it. It was quiet and she could shut out the rest of the world which is exactly what she needed. Space. Her own space to clear her mind.

She closed her eyes trying to erase everything that had happened in the last 48 hours but the memories came flooding back. "The US attorney approached me and I was forbidden from telling you." Tandy had said. Just another lie from her own sister that she trusted for years. Then there was Teddy thinking he could smooth everything over by pretending nothing happened and move back in to the house. Like she could forget about his lies about sleeping with Peggy while they were still married and embezzling money. Then the most recent, burying her father just a few days after finding out he lied about her mother's death. She couldn't even breathe just thinking about it all.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and it startled her. Her eyes snapped open, looking at Deacon standing beside her. "Everything alright?" He asked. She let out a deep and shaky breath and nodded.

She could tell he was analyzing her every move like he thought she was fragile and if he took his watchful eyes off of her she was going to break. "Has that lamp always been there?" She asked trying to change the subject before he could speak.

He watched her walk over to the lamp like it was a new discovery. He stood back and watched her, letting out a soft laugh. "Come on Ray, not that much has changed up here other than we're older now." Her eyes had been fixated on the lamp but she quickly turned her attention back to him and raised her eyebrows. "Older huh?" She repeated. Her tone a little surprised.

Maybe logically they were older. After all it had been nearly fifteen years since she had last seen the inside of the cabin but she didn't feel older. In fact being back at the cabin made her feel younger, like she had gone back in time.

He smiled. "Older, wiser, you know what I mean." He said hanging up his jacket on the coat rack.

She continued to look around. "And apparently neater, I don't remember ever seeing the hard wood floor in this room, ever." She said noticing how clean the floor looked compared to how it looked years ago with his house cleaning skills or lack thereof. "Well that's because there's no trail of clothes because we're wearing them." He said before he could stop himself.

Her eyes that had been scanning the walls suddenly shot in his direction.

He had just let out the elephant in the room. He shoved his hands in his pocket, feeling like an idiot. He awkwardly cleared his throat trying to move passed the comment. "Speaking of which I noticed you haven't taken off your jacket yet. Have you changed your mind about staying?" He asked cupping his hands in front of his face and breathing on them to warm them up.

She shook her head. "No, just trying to get warm." She said inching closer to the fire place. He nodded. "Well I can fix some tea if you'd like. Maybe that would warm you up." He suggested. She gave him a small smile. "That sounds good. Thanks."

He disappeared to the kitchen. Eventually she made her way there too taking a seat at the small table for two. When the water was hot, he poured it into two mugs, making his way to the table and handed her one.

"You know if I had the choice I would love to just leave everything behind and start fresh." Rayna said out of the blue as held her mug tightly feeling the steam from the cup. He sat forward in his chair, leaning across the table. "What do you mean by everything?" He asked curiously, taking a sip of his tea. "Everything." She repeated blowing into the cup before taking a sip. "Everything back in Nashville. I would just walk away and never look back. There's nothing and nobody in that town worth sticking around for."

She set her mug down and stared into it with a faraway look on her face when his voice interrupted her thoughts. "What about Maddie and Daphne?"

Rayna sighed. Her lip quivered at bit. "They deserve better than me." She said still looking down as her eyes started to water. "Ray, you're a good Mama. Don't you dare doubt yourself. You give those girls the world and beyond. YOU do that." He said trying to comfort her with his words.

He ducked his head trying to meet her gaze. "You lost your mama when you were 12, is that what you want for them? To be raised without a mother because you're on the run?" Deacon asked raising his tone slightly. A tear trickled down her face. "No. God no. I'm just tired of them seeing me cry all the time and Daphne wondering why her mommy is so sad all the time. I don't want them to see me like this. I'm trying to protect them."

Deacon stood from his chair to console her as he placed his hand gently on her back. "It's going to be okay Ray. You're welcome to stay here as long as you need. Just know that you're not alone. There are people that care about you and love you back in Nashville." He said. She gave him a half smile as a token of thanks.

He circled the counter, where the bags of groceries lay untouched.

"I didn't pick up much at the store but I'm sure I could whip us up something to eat." Deacon said putting away the groceries. "You know I'm really not that hungry." She replied.

"Really? I'm starving. How about I fix you a piece of toast? Just something light." He offered pulling out the loaf of bread. "No thanks." She said. "How about my famous scrambled eggs?" He asked with a grin knowing she couldn't refuse them.

She returned the smile. "Mmm tempting but I'm good." She said.

He looked over at her and noticed she had shed her coat. Her pants hung low on her hips and her collarbone was starting to show more than it ever had. His eyes scanned her thin frame alarmed.

"Ray, come on. We left Nashville hours ago. There's gotta be something here I can fix for you." He offered again, returning his gaze back to the bags on the counter as he continued digging through them.

She slammed her fist on the table, startling Deacon and herself. "Just stop!" She yelled making him freeze in his tracks. "I said I wasn't hungry. Now would you just drop it?" Rayna said agitated.

Deacon looked over at her stunned.

"I'm sorry. I'm just worried about you." Deacon said more gently. Rayna threw her hands in the air. "How many times do I have to tell you I'm fine Deacon?"

He shrugged still dumbfounded as to where this behavior was coming from. "I guess until I believe you." He said walking over to her. "You're turning away food, you've lost weight. So no I don't believe you're fine, Ray. Can you even remember the last time you had a good meal?" He asked. She stared at him blinking back tears.

He walked over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders, making her look at him. "You have a lot on your plate right now. You just lost your dad." Deacon said. Rayna pulled away from him abruptly, walking to the other side of the room. "My father was a cold blooded killer. He deserved to die." Rayna said angry.

"Is that what you told him when you two argued just before he died?" Deacon asked. Rayna stopped in her tracks and turned to face him. She shot Deacon a look, narrowing her eyes at him. "Where did you hear that?" She asked. Deacon dropped his head, feeling like he had just dug himself into a bigger hole. He rubbed his chin, mumbling his words. "Teddy told me."

Rayna put her hand on her hip, getting defensive again. "Since when are you and Teddy buddies?" She asked in a sharp tone bringing his attention back to her. Deacon threw his hands in the air defending himself. "We're not. He just mentioned it to me at the service today. Told me you had a fight, that's all." Deacon said hoping to calm her down a little. "Is that why you're pitying me? Because let me tell you something. I don't need your pity Deacon." Rayna shouted.

"Rayna." He said trying to reason with her. He took a step closer to her but she put her hands up to stop him. "I just want to be alone. I'm going to bed." He nodded taking the hint. "There are some old t-shirts and shorts in the dresser upstairs. I'll take the couch." He said. Without a word she turned on her heels and walked away.

Deacon sat down at the table for a moment wondering what just happened. He looked down at the loaf of bread sitting on the counter and suddenly he wasn't that hungry either.

Later that night, Deacon went upstairs to use the bathroom. He could see the light in Rayna's room was on and he heard her sobs all the way out in the hall. He wanted to check on her but he knew she wanted to be alone. He quickly brushed his teeth and headed downstairs to the couch.

He lay there awake wondering if she would eventually cry herself to sleep again. She had been through a lot and her body was paying the price. God knows she couldn't afford to lose another night of sleep. He willed her to come downstairs and indulge herself in a midnight snack like they used to go years ago when they stayed at the cabin. She'd dig into a bag of potato chips and grab her favorite dip out of the fridge and just eat until she had enough and she'd lick her fingers clean. Tonight that didn't happen. He knew she hadn't eaten or slept well in a while which would make anybody cranky. That person in the kitchen that snapped at him wasn't the Rayna he knew.

Neither one of them got much sleep that night.

The next morning, Deacon made himself some breakfast. Rayna hadn't come downstairs so he decided to give her her space. After eating breakfast, he decided to go out to the shed and hunt for his fishing pole.

Rayna came downstairs expecting to find him in the kitchen. "Deacon?" She said walking through the cabin looking for him. "Deacon?" She called out again. Nothing.

She walked over to the cupboard and pulled out a glass then walked to the sink. She turned the faucet on and poured herself a glass of water. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Deacon in the shed out the kitchen window. She watched him pull his fishing pole out and head down towards the pond. She quickly slipped on her shoes and followed him.

By the time she reached the pond, he had already set up to fish. She slowly snuck up behind him. After blowing up at him last night, she wasn't sure where he stood. "Hey." She said softly.

He turned to look at her and nodded then turned his gaze back out to the pond. She sighed as she stepped closer to him. He had every right to be mad at her. "You catchin' tonight's supper?" She asked fidgeting nervously with her hands.

He shrugged. "I don't know. Do you know how to cook trout Ray?" He asked not looking up at her. "Not really but if I remember correctly you do." She said hopeful. "Well I'm not going to be around for dinner." Deacon said coldly.

Her eyes fell to the ground, feeling guilty for pushing him away like she had. "Oh."

"I'm going to head back to Nashville. Give you your space." He said. Rayna was silent.

She walked over to the nearby bank and sat down, bringing her knees up to her chest. She looked out to the water then over at Deacon who just stared straight ahead, gripping his fishing pole. She knew he was mad. How could he help but be mad? She wondered.

She felt a tear escape her eye and she reached her hand up to wipe it away when another escaped. Before she knew it, she was sobbing. "De-Deac-Deacon." She sobbed as she looked over at him. He finally moved his gaze to her. "Yeah Ray?" He asked. "I'm sor-sorry." She sobbed.

Deacon stared at her for a moment. Watching her cry made his heart break. Not being able to sit there and watch her fall apart any longer he placed his fishing pole down and walked over to her. He wrapped his arm around her.

She rested her head on his chest and continued to sob. "I shouldn't have jumped down your throat like I did. You didn't deserve that. All you've been is nice to me. Bringing me up here and taking care of me. God, I'm such a mess." She said.

He looked down at her, hoping she would calm down. He hated to see her cry. "You're not a mess. You're grieving." He corrected her. "That's still not an excuse for my temper." She said looking up at him.

He shrugged. "I can take it. We'll just chalk it up to all those times my temper got out of hand." He said nudging her shoulder. She smiled. "You know you're the only person that hasn't lied to me." She said more serious. He chuckled. "Well I don't know about that. I did lie about staying sober all those years ago. Granted I have cleaned up my act since then."

She cocked her head as if that was nothing. "You've never murdered anyone or stole money." She said. He grinned. "Can't say I have." She nodded. "I'm not one of the bad guys you know? But you continue to push me away which is why I think if I leave this afternoon it'll be for the best." He said more serious. She looked away, keeping quiet. Tears formed in her eyes again. She turned back to look at him. "What if I didn't want you to leave?"


	4. Chapter 4

**You all are so kind! Thanks for all the reviews! I'm really enjoying writing this! Hope you continue to read & review!**

Two days later…

It always felt like Deacon knew everything there was to know about Rayna. He knew every scar on her body and where they came from, he knew about her obsession with cinnamon whether it was a candle or sprinkled on her food, he knew when her voice got a pitch higher than normal she was mad as hell. He thought he knew every little detail there was about her.

As for Rayna, she thought she knew everything about him too but after spending time up at the cabin she wasn't so sure. She was sixteen when she met him which seemed like a lifetime ago to her. She knew he hailed from Mississippi, had a sister she met three times over their relationship, a talented niece who was discovering the music business and a beautiful daughter which she took pride in helping him create. That was the extent of Deacon's family history she knew until today.

Deacon got to thinking with all this talk about Lamar maybe he shouldn't be so afraid to talk about his daddy. It was only Rayna after all. The rest of the world was miles away.

They sat on the couch while the fire crackled, swapping stories of their painful past.

Rayna sat beside him with her feet curled up under her, actively listening as she held her cup of tea in her hand. "Oh and then I'll never forget the time my daddy came home after being fired again. I believe it was the fifth job and our fourth home in six months. Couldn't keep a job or a house to save his life. And I remember my mama finding the bottle of whiskey and she said 'don't you know your children are starving? You can't even put food on the table but you made damn sure you had your whiskey huh?' and that was all it took. He grabbed her by her hair and swung her across the room. She sliced her head open on the corner of the kitchen counter. There was blood everywhere. My sister and I hid behind the curtains until he was passed out and then we checked on my mama. Tried to take care of her and the blood stains the best way we knew how." Deacon said glancing at the floor and shaking his head at the tragic memory.

Rayna gasped, setting her mug down on the coffee table. She suddenly wasn't interested in drinking it anymore. "Oh my God. I am so sorry. Why didn't you ever tell me this" She felt guilty for never getting to know this side of Deacon.

Deacon looked up and shrugged his shoulders. She could tell it bothered him to talk about it. "I didn't want anyone comparing me to him because I knew I was falling right into the footsteps of the man I hated most." He said, his tone bitter.

Rayna looked over at him and shook her head. "Are you serious?" She asked sitting up a little straighter. "I don't think that at all. You've lived in the same house for the past 12 years! You've been playing guitar for how long now?" Rayna asked pointing out the positive.

Running his hand through his hair, he tried to shake the memory. "Well one day I finally got the courage to stand up to him. I had saved up enough money from bussing tables to buy a one way ticket. I hopped on the Greyhound heading to Nashville and never looked back. Music was the only thing that saved me. It fed me, it clothed me and it led me to bigger gigs." Deacon nudging Rayna with his knee. She smiled. "You've done pretty damn well for yourself." She said. Deacon laughed. "I guess for the most part I have."

Rayna sighed, recalling a memory of her own. Deacon knew more about her family than she did his. He WAS there when Lamar kicked her out when she was just sixteen. He was there when Tandy had begged her to stay. He had been there to watch her children grow. He had been there when her marriage to Teddy fell apart. The one person in Rayna's life he didn't know too much about was her mother. She spoke about her often when they were writing a song. He sensed that her Mama was a big inspiration in her music career. But other than that little bit of information she shared with him at the cemetery he didn't know all that much about her mother.

"My mama had me sneaking out of the house when I was seven. She'd wake me up around 11 at night and we'd head off to these bars where the beer was cheap. One night my daddy caught us sneaking back in and boy did he give her the devil. He didn't want 'his daughter carrying the Wyatt name to be singing at no dive bar'." Rayna said imitating Lamar's voice with a smirk.

"So the next morning he came up to my room and told me he could get me a gig at the Country Club gala. I finally thought he was coming around to my passion for singing. I was all hyped up, even picked out a Patsy Cline song to sing at the Gala but when I got up on the stage and you would've thought I set the place on fire. Everyone ran as far as they could from my singing." Rayna said.

Deacon gave her a look. "Why?" He asked.

"Well-" She started to say as she bit her lip before proceeding with her story. "those country club types don't take a liking to country music. They wanted to hear me sing opera." Rayna said with distaste in her mouth. Deacon wrinkled his forehead. "Opera?" He asked in disbelief.

She smiled and nodded. "Of course even back then I was bullheaded. That wasn't the music I believed in and my father knew that. He thought if I was booed offstage, it would change my mind about pursuing music." Rayna said watching Deacon shake his head. "Unbelievable." Deacon said making a face. "That was the last time I listened to my daddy."

Deacon sat there for a minute absorbing what she just said. He looked up at her. "Opera?" He repeated.

Rayna laughed. "So my mama dragged me offstage at the country club and we stormed out of there so fast I think my head spun. That night she took me down to the Bluebird but I never got to sing. So we'd go back night after night. After waiting in line so many nights, they finally called my number. While I was up onstage my mama started talking to Watty White and that was when the affair started I guess." She shrugged.

Rayna twirled her hair around her finger thinking back. "Watty never used my music to get to mama though. He always had my music in his best interest. He would sit down with me and tell me what sounded good and we'd spend hours discussing song ideas. He'd listen to me ramble on and on about my hopes and dreams. Something my own father wouldn't have ever done with me."

Deacon raised his eyebrows. "Wow. I guess the better half doesn't live so differently."

Rayna nodded in agreement. "It just amazes me that we both turned out somewhat normal given our childhoods." Rayna said.

"Sounds like one bad country song doesn't it?" He asked grinned wide. She laughed at his facial expression. "It sure does."

Deacon stood from the couch and grabbed his guitar hanging on the hall. Rayna watched him and laughed. "Have you lost your mind? We can't write a song about our terrible childhoods." She said throwing her hands in the air.

He shrugged, strumming song chords. "Why not? You got a better idea to pass the time up here?"

She rolled her eyes. He started to strum and sing.

"Well my daddy liked to drink. He'd drink til he couldn't think. And her daddy wanted her to sing Opera." Deacon sang with a grin on his face.

Rayna laughed and reached over to pull his guitar out of his hands. "Stop, stop! That's pathetic." She said still laughing.

"Alright, alright, name a song, a real song and I'll play it." Deacon said pulling his guitar back. She shot him a look. "You know my whole set." She said stating the obvious.

"I'm trying to be serious here Ray. Name one." He said strumming a few more chords.

She studied his face. She could tell he wasn't being serious. "No you're not. You're still thinking about opera." She said. He shrugged. "It was pretty funny." He admitted. "Mmmhmm." She said tightening her lips trying to hold her laughter in but she burst into giggles.

He laughed too. After a few minutes, they collected themselves. "Well one good thing came out of this." He said more serious, setting his guitar next to the couch. She looked over at him. "What's that?" She asked.

"It's nice to hear you laugh instead of cry." The past 3 days since they arrived, she hadn't made it through an entire day without sobbing. She shrugged shyly, not quite meeting his eye contact. "I guess you bring out the best in me." She said looking up, finally making eye contact. She smiled at his reaction. He raised his eyebrows. "Really? I do that?" He asked searching her eyes.

She leaned closer to him, her eyes still hooked on his. "Are you-" He asked swallowing hard. "Are you going to name a song?" He asked leaning closer to her.

She mumbled something as her eyes started become hazy. "A song?" She repeated leaning closer to him.

"I could play." He said narrowing his eyes on her lips as he inched closer to her mouth. She could feel his breath on her skin. Her eyes were becoming heavier and heavier as he got closer.

"I Shouldn't Love You." Rayna mumbled barely above a whisper. "Hmm?" He muttered. "The song." She whispered her mouth almost touching his. "Song?" He asked stupidly, not making any sense any longer.

Not being able to control themselves much longer, they're mouths started to fumble. He cocked his head so he would be able to go in at just the right angle. She lifted her chin, giving him better access.

Their lips were so close to touching when they heard the sound of keys rattling.

Rayna jumped back. "What was that?" She asked alarmed. Both their eyes shot open, bringing them back to reality. "Sounded like someone outside." He said standing up quickly. "What if it's Teddy? Or Tandy? They can't know I'm here!" Rayna said panicking. "Okay you stay here. I'll see who it is." Deacon instructed.

The only thing on his mind as he walked over to the door was he had been so close to kissing Rayna and whoever was at the door, he had to get rid of fast.


	5. Chapter 5

**The wait is over! Here is a new chapter...finally! Hope you all enjoy! **

Deacon crept slowly to the door. He couldn't imagine who would've known he and Rayna were up there. Hell, he barely knew her plan of escape until she climbed into his truck at the cemetery. She would've never told a soul they were heading up to the cabin especially after she practically begged him to take her there to get away.

If he thought back, that was why he had bought the cabin, to get away. After Rayna had signed onto Edgehill and formed a fan base, she couldn't wait to get away, just the two of them. Escape the press and the rest of the world on their off time.

The door knob jiggled. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears and feel the blood rushing to his head. He wasn't sure if the adrenaline coursing through his body was caused from the intrusion or the heated moment he shared with Rayna just moments before.

The door started to slowly crack open. Deacon stood quietly behind the door, preparing himself to attack the intruder. He reached out and grabbed an arm.

"Oh my God." Scarlett gasped startled to see Deacon waiting by the door. "Scarlett?" Deacon asked stunned, loosening his grip on her arm. He took a step back from the door, breathing a sigh of relief it was only his niece.

She placed her hand over her chest to stop her heart from racing. "Uncle Deacon." She swallowed hard, blinking a few times to ward off the shock.

"What are you doing up here? Is everything okay?" Deacon asked concerned. "Yeah, I just I-" She looked over her shoulder towards the porch then back at Deacon. "I didn't expect you to be here." Scarlett explained glancing over her shoulder again.

Up until a few months ago, Deacon had no children of his own (or none that he knew of) but he had watched after Scarlett since she was a baby. When Rayna and the band started touring he always found time for that little girl when he was home on breaks. She looked up to him as a father figure because her real father wasn't around. He always knew when she rubbed her eyes, she was ready for a nap or when she bit her fingernails she was nervous. After watching her grow up he could read her like a book.

He stood at the door and observed her odd behavior. She was hiding something, he could tell. He folded his arms and frowned, speaking in a fatherly tone. "Really? Then what brings you up here?"

A loud grunt was heard behind her. Scarlett whipped her head around. "What the hell was that?" Deacon asked suspicious.

"I'm telling you St. Lucia would've been way better than this place. I think I just got eaten alive by all these damn mosquitos." Liam swore carrying their bags to the door.

Deacon looked from Liam to Scarlett. Liam glanced up, shaking the loose hair out of his face. "Oh come on, this guy is here?" Liam groaned.

Deacon never could stand Liam. He was cocky, rude and someone Rayna confided in. He was the first person she told about her divorce and the first person she turned to get back at Teddy. Deacon had tried not to think about it but he had been there for their performance of 'Postcard to Mexico'. Not only did it bug him that she was onstage with Liam, dancing that close to him but they were singing a song HE had wrote with her.

"This guy?" Deacon asked defensively. "This guy owns this place. What are you doing here?" His arms flying a mile a minute.

Liam smirked, he knew how to push Deacon's buttons. "I'm here with this chick." He said pointing at Scarlett.

Scarlett winced, feeling Deacon's eyes on her. She knew this was not going over well. She could see the vein in Deacon's neck bulging. "That's not a chick. That's my niece." Deacon said gritting his teeth. "Uncle Deacon, I can explain-" Scarlett interjected.

Liam chuckled. "Yeah relax Uncle Deacon." Liam said sarcastically as he walked past him. Deacon spun around, waving his finger. "Don't call me that." He watched Liam sit down on the sofa, propping his feet up on the coffee table. "And don't be making yourself comfortable either."

Deacon turned back to his niece, hoping there was a good explanation for this. "What are you doing here with him?"

She took a deep breath, treading lightly with her words. "We-We've been working really hard on the album. We just needed a break." She shrugged her shoulders, feeling the heavy tension fill the room.

"A break?" Deacon repeated. "Well you don't have to sleep at the studio every night. You could've come home once in a while if you wanted a break."

Although she wasn't a child, she felt herself crawling into her shell. "You're right. Maybe we should head back." Scarlett said motioning for Liam. Liam stayed where he was. "Look I just drove 2 hours to get here and I'm not driving back tonight." Liam explained. "The hell you aren't." Deacon said gritting his teeth again.

The door swung open from the other room. "Deacon? What is going on?" Rayna asked entering the room.

Liam chuckled seeing the surprised look on Rayna's face. "So this is the famous love shack huh?" Rayna shot him a look. "Liam?"

He sat up a bit on the couch. "I should've known you'd be here." Rayna crossed her arms, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with Liam's assumptions. "Well you're the last person I expected to see here." He shrugged. "It's not my first choice believe me but my girl here wanted to come up so here we are."

"Your girl?" Deacon and Rayna said at the same time both with disgust in their voices.

Liam pushed his hair out of his face. He could tell he had overstepped. He nodded towards Scarlett. This was her chance to stand up for herself. "I'm going to give you all a minute." Liam said excusing himself as he walked towards the door. He passed by a very angry Deacon whose eyes were glued on him.

Deacon turned back to Scarlett. "So is it true? Y'all are together?" Deacon asked Scarlett. Scarlett looked to the ground giving them the silent answer they were dreading to hear. Rayna crossed her arms waiting for the girl to answer. "Scarlett, he's your producer!" Scarlett looked up and nodded. "I can see y'all don't approve." Feeling the need for distance, Scarlett took a few steps away from them.

"Your partners and when you mix feelings in with that, things get very complicated and very messy." Rayna explained. Scarlett smirked, lifting her head to face them. "You mean like you two?" Scarlett asked bitterly.

Deacon immediately interjected. "Hey don't you dare be disrespectful to Rayna like that. Liam is just using you Scarlett. You deserve better than THAT." He gestured towards the door Liam had exited. Scarlett rolled her eyes, stepping back towards them. "Why can't you be happy for me? Gunner has moved on and so has Avery. I'm done sitting around feeling sorry for myself. I'm finally ready to move forward with my life."

Deacon reached out to grab her arm. "Scarlett-" He said trying to reason with her. "No!" She warned pulling away. He was taking back by her tone. She could tell she finally had their attention. In all her years, she finally felt she had the power now. That she was in control and could stand up for herself. Her eyes were spiteful and her tone harsh but full of truth. "Just because you're living in the past doesn't mean I have to!" Scarlett hollered looking from Rayna to Deacon.

Judging by their faces, she knew they knew exactly what she was referring to. They remained silent. Scarlett marched passed them, both of them still froze in their place. She picked up the bags Liam had carried in and she walked out the door.

Later that night, Deacon sat on the bank facing the pond. He picked up a rock and threw it in the water. "Skipping rocks?" A voice asked behind him. He turned to see Rayna walking towards him as she took a seat next to him on the grass. A million things ran through her head and the silence surrounding them wasn't helping the situation. She took a deep breath and let out a heavy sigh. Eventually, she turned to face his profile.

He caught her staring out of the corner of his eye and turned to face her. "Deacon-" Rayna said. "Ray-" Deacon said at the same time. Rayna nodded for him to go first. "I'm sorry for the way Scarlett spoke to you. I mean she had no right. She knows better." Rayna shrugged it off. "I've heard worse."

He nodded and turned back to face the water. "She was way out of line." Deacon said. Rayna bit her lip trying to hold her thoughts inside but before she knew it she blurted it out. "Was she?" This immediately grabbed Deacon's attention. He whipped his head towards her. Did he hear what he thought he just did?

Rayna shifted on the ground, feeling a bit shy all of a sudden. "I mean this place-" She gestured towards the cabin. "It IS part of our past, a big part." He tried to make sense of what she was telling him. "That-that is true." He said slowly.

Every room, every picture, every piece of furniture in the cabin was a constant reminder of them. He thought back to that afternoon. Maybe that almost kiss was a sign that no matter what, this place somehow always brought them closer together.

"But I don't want you to think THAT's why I brought you up here." He said so subtly, referring to what almost happened that afternoon.

She wrinkled her forehead trying to hide her expression. "I don't." She said shaking her head in denial. "And I don't want you to think THAT's why I asked you to stay." She said also trying to be subtle. He shrugged, masking his expression this time. "I don't."

She nodded, both of them becoming silent again. She watched the moonlight reflect on the water as her emotions got the best of her. "It's just-" She said tears starting to form in her eyes. "I don't have a father or a sister I can depend on anymore." She turned to face him as a tear flowed softly down her cheek. "You're the only person I trust, Deacon." She said through her tears.

He offered her a half smile, wrapping his arm around her. She buried her head in his chest. "That's what friends are for right?" He asked comforting her.

He felt the warmth of her body and smelled the sweet smell lingering from her hair, something that was so familiar to him but yet something he hadn't been close to in a while. He tried to think of anything but that almost kiss but he couldn't. Not when she was this close to him. God, she felt so good in his arms, he thought.

She felt his strong arms around her. He always knew exactly how to make her feel safe she thought. She listened to the soothing sound of his heartbeat, something that was familiar to her that she hadn't been heard in a long time.

He wanted so badly to continue what they started hours early but he kept his thoughts inside his head

Little did he know the exact same thoughts were running through her head. She snuggled closer to him, closing her eyes and putting her head closer to his chest, listening to the rhythm. "Friends…right." She mumbled into his chest.


	6. Chapter 6

**Here's a new update! It got a little long but I hope you take the time to read it all! Thanks again for reading and reviewing! **

Lying on his back on the couch that night, Deacon stared up at the ceiling. It was pitch black dark but the more he laid away thinking, the clearer things were becoming.

Things had definitely changed since the accident. She had made it clear she wanted distance between the two of them, to allow themselves to grow separately. After only being twelve days sober that night at the accident site, he wanted to crawl back in his dark hole hearing her harsh words cut him open like a sharp knife.

She barely talked to him since that night other than casual conversation but when she asked him to bring her up to the cabin he was surprised to say the least. Maybe there was light at the end of the long dark tunnel, he thought. Finally they were becoming comfortable with each other again even if it wasn't how it used to be, he would take what he could get. Maybe they were meant to grow separately but sometimes growing separately didn't always mean growing apart.

His heart jumped when he heard the creaking from footsteps on the stairs. He sat up quickly, flipping on the light next to the couch. Reaching the bottom of the stairs, she winced when she saw he was awake. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." He adjusted his pillow, trying not to appear startled. "I was up."

Her mind had been racing all night thinking about how upset Scarlett was. She had never her like that before and the look on Deacon's face told her, he hadn't either. She worried about where she might go, what she might say or who she might tell. If she said anything, Rayna's cover would be blown. The whole world would know where she was hiding out and she wasn't ready for that yet.

She wondered if he had been thinking about the same thing. She bit her lip as she shifted her weight on her feet. "Couldn't sleep?"

"No, you either?" He could tell something heavy was weighing on her mind. He patted the cushion next to him, inviting her to sit down. She walked over to the couch and sat down cautiously. She knew standing ten feet away from him he had been analyzing her and sitting next to him she felt like a goldfish with all on eyes on her. She couldn't hide what she was thinking or feeling. He could read her like a book. "I've been thinking a lot about the girls. You don't think Scarlett would say anything about us being up here to anyone do you? Because the last thing I need is for this to get back to the girls. I don't want them to think I abandoned them!"

Tearing her eyes away from him, she nervously fidgeted with her hair. He could tell she was worked up at the thought of the girls thinking bad of her. The press could say what they will about her disappearance after her father's death and she wouldn't flinch but when it came to Maddie and Daphne she wanted to shelter them, have a chance to explain and make them understand why she had to get away if they found out.

"Those girls idolize you Ray. You can do no wrong in their eyes."

She kept herself distracted, tapping her fingers on the coffee table. "I hope you're right. I've been pretty hard on Maddie about this whole music career thing." Deacon shrugged. "You only want what's best for her and I see nothing wrong with that. She has plenty of time to start a career when she's older if that's still what she wants to do."

Taking a deep breath, she struggled with her words, contemplating to defend or argue Deacon's last statement. "I-I know but-" She paused, sighing. "the girl has so much talent and I'm not being bias because she's my kid!" Giving her guitar lessons the last couple of months, Deacon knew just how talented the girl was. He felt like he had learned more from her, the way she picked up things so quickly. He had never experienced that before with any of his other students. She was a natural. He beamed just thinking about her. "I know, she's got a raw talent that's for sure."

At fifteen, Maddie was so innocent. She was a lot different than her mama around that age. Rayna had always had tough skin. Her father was always criticizing her choices and the industry was no different. Everyone was wondering what a sixteen-year-old girl was doing with a bar fly like Deacon Claybourne but she didn't care what they said. None of it seemed to affect her.

Maddie on the other hand had had her world turned upside down. Rayna couldn't blame her for acting out after everything came out but if she was going to be in the music world, she was going to have to handle things more graciously. "I just don't want to see her get eaten alive by this business but I don't want to stand in her way like my dad did to me, you know?" Rayna debated, running her hands through her hair. "If she can learn to handle the pressure, I think she's ready now! I've been thinking about my new label and possibly signing her. Am I crazy?"

Deacon looked at her surprised. The worried look on his face made her continue to try and reason with him. "I mean my label could use a teen that could reach that demographic." Deacon nodded. "That-that is a huge demographic." Deacon agreed. Rayna smiled at him. "Really? So you don't think I'm crazy?" She asked playfully nudging him with her knee. He chuckled. "Well, if I had the opportunity to start my career at fifteen I would've. I mean you could try it out, see how it goes." She nodded, excitedly. "I think I will! Can't hurt right?" He shook his head. "No harm in testing the waters. Just remember if this is a success I helped with this decision."

Rayna giggled. "Alright, name your price." He thought for a moment. "How about a guy for your label?" He finally asked.

Scarlett was her first and only artist. Add Maddie to the mix, it was yet another female. A male would be a nice addition, she thought. "Sure, you know one?" Deacon threw his arms in the air with a big goofy grin on his face. "You're looking at him!" His grin quickly disappeared when he caught he rolling her eyes. He sat forward, pleading. "Come on, Ray. Why not?" Rayna studied his face. She wasn't sure if he was joking so she burst out laughing. "You can't be serious."

Listening to her laugh at him, he crossed his arms in defense. "Are you saying you wouldn't sign me as one of your artists?" He asked more serious. She collected herself noticing the tone in his voice. "It's not you, it's just you're Scarlett's uncle and Maddie's father. If I had Scarlett, Maddie and you we'd have a family band." Rayna explained, gently.

"What's wrong with that?"

She thought for a moment. Family bands seemed to be a thing of the past. The Judds, The Jacksons. She smirked. "What are we the Osmonds?"

He quickly pointed his finger at her. "There's nothing wrong with the Osmonds."

She rolled her eyes, trying to be rational. "You already have a record label, Deacon."

When he had gone out looking for a solo career, he thought he was prepared. He didn't mind the late night shows, being out on the road and away from home but there was one think he wasn't prepared for. "Not anymore."

She sat back on the couch, wrinkling her forehead. "What? Since when?"

"About three weeks."

Three long weeks of sticking it out to try and be a good sport. "What happened?"

"Wasn't the right fit I guess."

The right fit? She wondered. He had played country music in her band for years and briefly made a switch to the rock group, Rebel Kings. If he didn't fit the part, he always made himself fit and did a damn good job at it too. So how could he sit there and tell her it wasn't a good fit? "Why?"

He smirked just thinking back to that meeting with the label executes. "They wanted that old Deacon sound and I don't do old Deacon anymore." Now she was completely lost. "What do you mean old Deacon sound?"

"You know. That sound. Those songs." She looked at him blankly. "OUR songs." It had finally clicked. "Oh." She replied. They wanted him to partner with other artists, more or less hinting at Rayna because word had gotten around she was leaving Edgehill. "They're not exactly looking for Deacon Claybourne the solo artist. They're looking for the Deacon and Rayna special. I guess some ways I'll always be tied to you." She couldn't believe they wasted his time and used him like that. She felt guilty in a way. "I'm sorry."

Not wanting to sound like he was blaming her, he shrugged it off. "It's not your fault, Ray. It's those damn label executives that can't see me as anything but your guitarist." She nodded, relieved but still aware of her guilt. "Well that's their lost because you're very talented. They don't know what they're missing out on."

They sat in silence for a moment. He had tried to think of everything to convince that record label he was a good solo artist, even straining his injured hand just to prove he still had what it took to make it in this business. A smirk appeared on his face. He shook his head at the thought that popped into his head. "I even tried to sell them on 'Best of Intentions' but they still weren't satisfied."

He knew by the confused look on her face, he had said too much. "I don't think I've ever heard that one have I?" She asked. Suddenly wanting to take it back he scratched his head awkwardly. "Probably not." He was hoping that would satisfy her curiousity but he should've known better. She questioned everything. "Is it new?" He shook his head. "No, I wrote it a long time ago."

These short answers he was providing her with were driving her nuts. "Can I hear it?" He chuckled uncomfortably. "I don't know, Ray."

Studying his face for a moment, she finally got why he was being so weird. "Is it about me or something?" Weren't they all? She thought after asking the obvious. He couldn't even give her a straight answer but she knew that was a yes. "I-I wrote it on my fifth stint in rehab." That was the truth. There was nothing better to do in that institute, surrounded by those ugly yellow walls. He knew he had done wrong when she didn't even come to visit him like she had all the times before. She had dropped him off at the door and with tears in her eyes, she clung to him before whispering goodbye in his ear. He didn't realize she meant goodbye for good.

He would write every day, hoping that when he got out he could play them all for her and here they were fifteen years later and she was asking him to play them. "Well if you're going to be one of Highway 65's artists than you better start sharing your material with me." He chuckled. "Does that mean I got the job?"

"Don't change the subject! I want to hear this song." He sighed. "Ray, it's-it's-" She raised her eyebrows waiting for him to continue. "What?" She asked. "Personal." He added.

She shot him a look. "Personal? You were willing to sell it to a record label! If I was the inspiration to this song I think I deserve to hear it."

She stood up and picked up his guitar and handed it to him. "Come on. I'm waiting! This is your audition Deacon."

He chuckled. "My audition huh?" She nodded. "One question, would we be the Jaymes band or what family band name are we going to use?" She laughed. "Very funny! Now play!" He started to tune his guitar. "If I play this then you have to play one too." He said.

"You know all my songs."

He shook his head with a smirk on his face. "Not the ones you've been writing in that notebook you have stashed away upstairs." Her eyes grew wide in embarrassment. He nodded. "I see you writing before I go to bed at night." He added. She immediately got defensive, turning away from him. "Well that's-"

"Personal?" He asked with a smirk. She rolled her eyes. "Deal."

He started to strum the first few chords. His fingers never forgetting the sound. He had played this moment a thousand times over in his head but yet he was so nervous to sing this song to her after all these years. He stared straight ahead as he sang.

_I had big plans for our future_  
_Said I'd give you the whole world somehow_  
_I tried makin' good on that promise_  
_Thought I'd be so much further by now_  
_Never could build you a castle_

He smiled, loosening up a bit. He turned his gaze to her, continuing to sing.

Even though you're the queen of my heart  
But I've had the best of intentions from the start

_Now some people think I'm a loser_  
_Cause I seldom get things right_  
_But you make me feel like a winner_  
_When you wrap me in your arms so tight_  
_Please tell me you will remember_  
_No matter how much I do wrong_  
_That I had the best of intentions all along_

She swayed back and forth on the couch, listening to his sweet voice. He closed his eyes, remembering just how personal this song was.

_I gave you a ring_  
_And I promised you things_  
_I always thought we'd do_  
_But my best-laid plans_  
_Slipped right through my hands_  
_To show my love for you_  
_And if you could read my heart_  
_Then you'd know without exception_  
_It was all with the best of intentions_

He watched her smile. His pounding heart started to calm itself down. His tone more serious with the last verse.

_So here I am asking forgiveness_  
_And praying that you'll understand_  
_Don't think I take you for granted_  
_Girl, I know just how lucky I am_  
_Though you deserve so much better_  
_You won't find devotion more true_  
_Cause I've had the best of intentions_  
_Girl, I've had the best of intentions_

He smiled as she joined in singing with him on the last line.  
_Yes, I've had the best of intentions loving you_

He took a deep breath, relieved it was over. He felt so exposed but yet so comfortable with Rayna. "Well? What'd you think?" He asked. She tried her best to stay in control but she was slowly losing it. Her lip quivered. "The world might think you're just Rayna Jaymes' guitar player but you're the reason why I have a career because of songs like that, that hit you right-" She placed her hand over her heart as a tear fell down her cheek. "Here." She whispered.

She quickly wiped her tear away. She stood from the couch. "I'm sorry." She said excusing herself and turning her back so he wouldn't see her cry. He knew it had gotten to her. "Where are you going? You promised me a song." He said trying to lighten the mood. She shook her head with her back still to him. "I can't."

Deacon placed his guitar down and walked over to her. "Ray." He said sneaking up behind her. He placed his hands on her shoulders. "Rayna look at me." She still didn't face him. She shook her head as she sobbed. "Please don't cry Darlin'." Just hearing that nickname roll off his tongue made her come undone completely. "Hey." He whispered inching closer to her. She turned to face him with tears streaming down her face.

He opened his arms and she clung to him, sobbing on his shoulder like she did that day when she dropped him off at rehab. He stroked her hair, trying to calm her down. "Was my singing that bad?" He joked. She laughed a little through her tears. He pulled back to look at her, holding her shoulders. "Are you going to be okay because I believe you still owe me a song."

She nodded wiping more tears away. He smiled at her, making her go weaker and weaker. "Good. Now why don't you go get cleaned up and grab your notebook." He instructed as his hands slid down her shoulders to her wrist. He turned to walk back to the couch but she caught his arm, making him spin around to look at her.

He searched her eyes, seeing that desire reflex back at him. He stepped closer to her, bringing his hand up to her face and softly brushing his thumb against her cheek. He gently pushed her hair out of her face as he leaned closer to her. He went in nice and slow. His lips met hers ever so gently.

The emotion of the moment took over both of them. The need to be close stronger than ever.

He pulled back and looked at her. There were no words, no need for them. Her hand reached up and stroked the stubble on his face, letting him know she was okay. He smiled as he played with her hair. He reached for her hand that was stroking his stubble, taking it in his and kissing the top of it. She blushed at the contact. She intertwined his fingers around hers. Then she leaned in and kissed him again.


	7. Chapter 7

**After seeing last week's episode at the cabin, I decided to change this chapter a bit. I really liked them "arguing" because it just goes to show their passion for one another. It's undeniable! ;) Thanks for all the reviews and for your patience! Hope you enjoy!**

Deacon had come to accept he had a problem his fifth stint in rehab. The first few times were a joke. He did what he had to do to stay clean for 28 days and they would release him.

Each time he had promised himself that he was going to be stronger when he got out but temptation always won him over. He always found a reason to drink whether it was a CMA party, a platinum album he helped write or a Sunday BBQ. It seemed there was always an occasion to celebrate.

There was never a preference of beverage although he did favor Jack Daniel's but not even a bottle of Jack Daniels could compare to Deacon's favorite addiction. Rayna Jaymes.

The moment she kissed him that night, right there in the middle of the cabin, the cabin he bought for her, he was hooked again. The taste of her lips on his. Her fingers raking through his hair. The soft touch of her other hand creasing his bicep. His heart raced as his tongue battled with hers.

She had allowed him to lead her, their lips never separating. It was all so familiar yet his knees felt like they were about to give out at any minute. He took a seat at the first thing he came in contact with. The arm of the couch. He sat facing the fireplace with his arms wrapped around Rayna's tiny waist.

She stood in front of him. Her hands cupping his face. She inched closer to him as she took a seat on his knee, feeling his hand wander up the outside of her leg to her butt. Her tongue traced his lips making his grip on her butt firmer.

He couldn't believe fifteen years later after writing that song it would still have the same effect he intended. After all the fighting, the drinking, the rehab and the accident, they were finally here right now. It all felt so right until all of a sudden something came over her.

She pulled back, standing up quickly. He saw the look in her eyes and it worried him. "What's wrong Darlin'?"

She stared at him for a moment not saying a word. His mind began to race wondering what he could've done so wrong. Then he looked into her eyes filled with tears. Why was she still crying he wondered? Was she thinking about the song? About them? He heard her mumble something about "time" and then before it all sunk in she was gone. She ran up the stairs and he never found the courage to go after her.

The next day, Rayna laid out a blanket on the ground next to the pond. She played with the frills, unraveling them around her finger. She had thought about leaving that morning, taking Deacon's keys and running away again but she didn't. The pond had been the farthest place she could get from the cabin, to keep her distance. She wasn't sure she could face him after running off so quickly the night before.

Deacon rounded the corner of the shed where he had been all morning, reorganizing and trying to stay busy. He spotted her from a far contemplating to turn around and walk away or approach her. Before he could make a decision, the cool spring breeze blew against the shed door causing it to slam. She looked over her shoulder towards the racket and saw him.

"I'm sorry." He paused when she turned to face him. "I didn't realize you were out here. I thought-I thought you were upstairs writing or something."

He hadn't said two words to her since last night. Of course, she couldn't blame him but she didn't think he would even notice her being gone from inside. She nodded as she looked down and unraveled another string. "I-I was but-" She paused looking up to meet his gaze. "I needed some air you know?"

Early on in their relationship, this is where he would've gone off on her. Start yelling and demanding answers but this time he remained calm. "Sure. Well I'll get out of your way." Deacon replied, turning to leave.

"Deacon." Rayna called making him turn around to look at her. Her pleading eyes connected with his. "Come on. Don't do this."

"Do what?"

"You're-you're punishing me."

He was punishing her? He thought. He smirked as he shrugged his shoulders. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm just giving you your space like you asked me to do." Sarcasm ringing in his voice. She cocked her head to the side, trying to reason with him. "That's not what I said."

He chuckled a bit, it was the only way he knew how to hide his anger towards her at that moment. "That's exactly what you said. You kissed me and then told me you needed some time."

"WE need some time." Rayna corrected him.

He ran his hand through his hair as he sighed. He was torn between sticking around to argue or leave. He decided to bit his tongue as he turned and walked away but his temper got the best of him as he turned back around, stepping closer to her. "Whatever the hell happened last night whether it was you grieving the loss of your dad or the song or something else, there's still this thing between us and you can't deny that." He said boldly. She looked up at him, her tear stricken eyes meeting his.

He swayed back and forth on his feet, trying to contain himself. "You keep-you keep holding me at arms-length thinking in time it'll all go away but it won't Rayna. It won't!" No longer able to keep it together, a tear escaped her eye. "Don't you think I know that?" Her voice shook. "I feel guilty for what happened last night." She stood to meet his gaze. He smirked, bringing his hand to his hip. He shook his head, looking to the ground and then back up at her. "Guilty?" He repeated.

She smacked her lips together and nodded. "I'm the reason you fell off the wagon six times! I married Teddy while you were in rehab and lied to you about Maddie." She said her eyes filling with tears again.

"I never said tha-" He started to say when she cut him off. "I'm the reason you don't have a music career and a family. All your hopes and dreams that we talked about twenty years ago have been destroyed because of me." Rayna explained. "I wanted a family with you. Hell, I wanted to be your wife. So can I deny this thing between us? No I can't Deacon but I'm going to keep trying to because I don't want to send you down that road again."

"Road? What road? Rayna I'm not going to drink again. Do you have such little faith in me? In us?" He asked. Rayna's eyes met his. She didn't say anything for a while. "I can't do this Deacon." She could tell her words stung him watching his eyes grow misty.

It broke her heart having to say those words but she was only trying to protect him. She thought. Unwilling to face him any longer, she walked over to the edge of the pond, staring into the water.

As much as he wanted to hate her, he couldn't. He couldn't let her go, not without a fight. He walked after her. "Rayna, wait!" She spun slowly to face him. "I-" He said scratching his facial hair, thinking. "I don't blame you."

"Well you have every right to." She replied. He brought two fists up to his forehead as he growled through his teeth. God, she was so stubborn. "Stop thinking you have to be so strong! To hell with carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders and tip toeing around because you think I'm going slip again." She buried her face in her hands as she wept. Finally, he was getting somewhere with her. He thought as he stepped closer to comfort her cautiously touching her arm. "You said you trusted me. Just yesterday you said-" He paused when she looked up at him, her face red from tears. "I-I do trust you."

He took another step closer to her this time resting his hands on her shoulders, ducking his head to meet her gaze. "Then stop pushing me away. Let me in. Let me be there for you like God knows you were for me when I was at my worse." She drew in a sharp breath as a sob escaped her lips. Bringing her hands up to cover her face again, he gave her arm a gently tug. "Look at me." He said gently. She shook her head still covering her face. "Look at me!" He demanded this time more forceful. She shook her head again. "No." She replied.

He ran his fingers through his hair. Clearly he wasn't getting through like he intended. "Damnit Ray! Look at me!" He grabbed her shoulder.

She tried to escape his grasp. "No! Just stop." She yelled wiggling out of his hold. She took a step backwards. He wasn't about to lose this battle, not after everything they'd been through. He reached for her arm again. "Let go Deacon." She warned. He stared into her eyes and saw that desire again. He shook his head. "No. I won't let you go. Not this time." He replied as tears threatened his eyes.

She could feel him breathing standing this close. She was weak. She had to stay strong. She reminded herself. "I said let go." She repeated yanking her arm away again. She took another step backwards. "Rayna." He warned. She took another step backwards, trying to put distance between them. "Rayna, watch out-" He warned again but it was too late. She stumbled backwards into the pond...


	8. Chapter 8

**I know a few of you were confused with the way things ended in the previous chapter so I hope this one is a little better...**

**_Previously:_**

**_"_****_Let go Deacon." She warned. He stared into her eyes and saw that desire again. He shook his head. "No. I won't let you go. Not this time." He replied as tears threatened his eyes._**

**_She could feel him breathing standing this close. She was weak. She had to stay strong. She reminded herself. "I said let go." She repeated yanking her arm away again. She took another step backwards. "Rayna." He warned. She took another step backwards, trying to put distance between them. "Rayna, watch out-" He warned again but it was too late. She stumbled backwards into the pond._**

Present:

Rayna could work a stage like nobody's business. She had never missed a step with choreography that Deacon could remember. She was just a natural up there, moving so effortlessly but offstage he could count the number of times she stubbed her toe, stumbled up the stairs or slid on a piece of ice in her new boots. She had even tripped over her own feet when they first learned how to two step years ago.

He thought he had seen it all until she took that final step back, her arms failing and next came a big splash into the pond.

When Deacon saw her float back up to the top of the water, knowing she was alright he chuckled to himself.

She wiped her wet hair out of her face and growled. "This is not funny Deacon!" She warned. He continued to laugh. "It kind of is. Ya see Ray, I tried to warn you but you wouldn't listen so-." He pointed to the pond. "Here you are."

She gave him a cold glare. "Get me out of here!" He crossed his arms, challenging her. "And how do would you like me to do that?" He asked. "I don't care if you have to climb in here after me! Just get me the hell out of here!"

He stared at her for a moment, thinking. A smile appeared on his face as he thought back to when he first bought the cabin….

It was a very hot Tennessee summer. They had cracked the window to the bedroom but still the miserable heat consumed them. It was the middle of the night when Deacon suggested they cool off in the pond. He had grabbed her hand before opening the back door. "Deacon it's the middle of the night." She hesitated. "Yeah I know and it's hot as hell which is why we need to cool off." He tugged at her hand again, feeling her pull him back again. "What is it?" He asked.

"Wh-what if there are bears outside?" He smiled at her concern. Clearly, Lamar never took her camping as a child. "There are no bears up here Darlin'." He fibbed with a charming smile. She shot him a look, not quite believing him. "I'll protect you. Now come on before I'm nothing but a big puddle of sweat here in the kitchen." He slung an arm around her shoulder and she nervously clung to him as they made their way through the woods to the pond.

He dove in first, instantly feeling the water cool him. She stood on the bank, glancing back towards the woods. "The bears are going to get you if you stand up there you know?" He grinned.

"But you said-" Her eyes growing wide with worry. "So there ARE bears up here?"

He shrugged. "What would you do if I said yes? Run back to the cabin by yourself or jump in here with me?" He smiled wickedly.

She couldn't resist him. She smiled back at him before kicking off her shoes. "You're lucky I love you so much you know that? I wouldn't do this for just anybody."

"I love you too, Ray. Now get in here I'm getting lonely."

A devilish smile crept up on her face. "What's that look for?" He asked trying to read her. She didn't say a word instead she pulled at the hem of her t-shirt slipping it over her head. She quickly slid her panties down and stepped out of them before joining him…

Boy did he wish things could be like that night again, having her legs wrap around his waist, her naked body pressed against his as she clung to him and kissed him passionately. Later, he lifted her out of the water and onto the pier where he made love to her until the sun came up. That was a night he could never forget.

But things were far from the way they used to be. He was fooling himself if he thought he could dive in and she would cling to him like she did that night but there was no way for her to escape now. Her only way out was with his help. She couldn't run or push him away, she was counting on him, he thought to himself.

He kicked off his shoes and began to remove his shirt. She looked away, knowing it was too easy to fall into his trap. "This is your fault." She said bitterly. He smirked, tossing his shirt on the ground. "My fault? This is so typical Rayna, always blaming someone else."

"Oh I'm typical?" Rayna asked sarcastically as she rolled her eyes.

"I'm sorry, did you not hear me the first time?" He asked sarcastically back.

She slammed her hands down hard on the water making a big splash as she growled. "I swear to God Deacon if you don't get me out of here in the next five seconds-"

He stepped closer to the pond, leaning over to face her. "Then what? What are you doing to do?"

She wiped her wet hair out of her face again, glaring at him.

He waited for her to realize and admit that she needed him more than she knew but instead she didn't say anything which only made him more pissed. He stood up straighter. "Maybe you're right. Maybe I need my own space. Maybe you should find your own way out." He bent over to pick up his shoes and shirt.

She watched him, her heart racing after hearing her words thrown back at her. She knew that he was angry but he would never turn his back on her she thought. "You wouldn't dare leave me in here." This only fueled him more. "Watch me!" He turned on his heels as he walked away barefoot.

"Deacon! Deacon!" She hollered as he kept walking. "Deacon! Get back here!" She yelled. She swam to the pier and clung on to the side, trying to pull herself out but struggling. He heard her groan loudly. "Deacon, please. It's freezing in here." He stopped in his tracks, closing his eyes and cursing himself for wanting to help her.

He turned around, walking straight to the pier. He held out his hand and helped her out.

Once she climbed out she sat on the pier shivering. He walked over to the bank and grabbed the blanket she had been sitting on to drape over her arms. She looked up at him. "Thank you." She said softly. He just nodded. She could tell he was still angry. He turned to head for the cabin.

"Where are you going?"

"I'm going to get the fire going so you won't catch cold." She watched him walk away feeling more guilty than she did the night before.

Later, she had made her way inside and upstairs to get into a hot shower. When she returned downstairs, he was in the kitchen. She stood in front of the fire for a moment, feeling the warmth in her bones. He walked in carrying a cup of hot tea. "Here's your tea."

She took the cup before noticing he didn't have one. "Thanks. Where's yours?"

"I'm not having any." She nodded slowly. "Oh." She replied.

"I'm going to start packing things up. We can leave in the morning." He explained. They hadn't discussed leaving, but she went along with it anyway. "Okay-sure." She replied with a light shrug. "I mean you said you felt guilty for being away from the girls." She took a small sip of her tea. "Yeah, I-I do miss them."

"So we'll leave right after breakfast." She nodded as he turned to walk away.

"Wait." She closed her eyes and then cursed herself when he turned around to face her. "Yeah?"

"This isn't right." He looked at her confused. "Did you want to leave tonight?" She shook her head. "No, I'm not talking about leaving. I'm talking about us. It shouldn't be this way. All this tension. We were getting along so well before. I know you're mad as hell at me. I'm mad as hell at me too. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. I shouldn't-" She said before he interrupted her. "You shouldn't have kissed me."

She could hear the hurt in his tone. Her eyes started to well up with tears. He turned away and walked out of the room.

That night she heard him coming up the stairs. She tiptoed out of bed and stood in the doorway of her bedroom. He almost jumped not expecting to see her standing there. "You were right." She said boldly. He sighed, running his hand over his face. "For God sake Rayna, go to bed."

"I can't sleep knowing that you're mad at me." Indeed he was mad at her. "What about last night when I couldn't sleep?" He asked. She took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his words. "I'm sorry." She replied taking a step closer to him.

He put his hands out to stop her. "Just stop. I'm giving you your space like you wanted." He turned towards the bathroom. "Deacon, please just talk to me." She begged. Slowly, he turned to face her. "What the hell do you want from me? First you push me away and now you want to talk?" She covered her face with her hands. "I know. It's just been eating at me. I'm torn and confused and- I know I hurt you and that's exactly why I pushed you away but-" She looked up at him, a look he knew all too well. "But what?"

Taking in a deep breath, she met his gaze. "I need you." He ran his hand through his hair. How could she do this to him he wondered. "You need me?" His tone sharp and annoyed. It made her shake but she needed to let him know. "I try so hard to fight it, I do, I just-I can't."

Not saying a word, he grunted through his teeth. "I don't want to hurt you, Deacon but I-I-" She continued.

Finally able to speak, he cut her off. "There was a time I needed you too." He sighed realizing how harsh he sounded. "Look, we both just need to get some sleep. You're confused and upset. I think leaving tomorrow is the best idea. So goodnight Rayna." He said walking into the bathroom and closing the door behind him.

Every feeling filled her. Hurt, sadness and the feeling of defeat. Something caught her eye inside the bedroom as she walked in. Pulling out the notebook of songs she wrote, she begins flipping through the pages until she found the song she was looking for. She glanced out towards the hall at the bathroom door and decided to sing acapella.

I never had no one  
I could count on  
I've been let down so many times  
I was tired of hurtin'  
So tired of searchin'  
'Til you walked into my life

**She watched as the bathroom door slowly cracked open. Stepping out, he made his way out to the hall, standing in the doorway of her room listening to her sing. She smiled at him as she continued to sing.**

You stand by me  
And you believe in me  
Like nobody ever has  
When my world goes crazy  
You're right there to save me  
You make me see how much I have

**He sighed listening to her sweet voice. **

You're more than a lover  
There could never be another  
To make me feel the way you do  
Oh we just get closer  
I fall in love all over  
Everytime I look at you  
And I don't know where I'd be  
Without you here with me  
Life with you makes perfect sense  
You're my best friend

After finishing the song, she shut her notebook, tossing it aside before walking over to him. "Yeah I'm confused but there's one thing I'm sure of, that I've always been sure of Deacon." He swallowed hard as he looked at her. "What's that Ray?"

Tears began to fill her eyes. "No one will ever love you like I do." He smiled. "Same for me Ray." She smiled back when he reached for her hand. They stood there for a moment in silence just staring at each other.

She stepped closer to him but he stepped back. "That was a beautiful song." He said maintaining his distance. She nodded. "I owed you a song and the truth. I meant every word. You were there for me when nobody else was. You were there when I was sixteen and getting kicked out of my house and you're here now even when I don't deserve you. I'm sorry I pushed you away and said all those mean things to you. I just-" She began to cry. "I want you so much but I can't stand to think about hurting you all over again." She explained walking over to sit on the bed.

As hurt as he was, he understood where she was coming from. He followed, sitting down next to her. He opened his arms and embraced her as she sobbed against his chest. He rocked her back and forth until she calmed down. She lifted her head from his chest and sighed. "I get that you're scared I'll slip and God knows I've given you every reason to be. Sure, we're bound to disagree but we'll work through it, you and me."

She looked up at him through her teary eyes and smiled a small smile. "You and me." She repeated. He smiled and nodded. She glanced down at his hand before taking it in hers. "Forever." He gave her hand a squeeze. "Through thick and thin?" He asked. She nodded. "I promise I won't let go, not this time." She said repeating his words from earlier that day. Leaning closer to her, his lips softly touched hers. Her hand nudged his chest pushing him down on the bed as she climbed on top of him.


End file.
